White Hairs

The Radio case is two thirds sorted, I did another broadcast today, so hopefully that has persuaded the people concerned.

I had some fun assisting a local farmer reap rice. After a demonstration [on how to handle a scythe correctly], we went in bare-feet with scythes and hacked at the rice stalks. The mud was really squishy, and at some points I was sinking!

It's been particularly stressful these past two weeks. I guarantee the appearance of white hairs by the time this contract is over. At school, I often find myself feeling the urge to shriek obscenities and throw stuff across the room... which is disturbing, but fortunately has not happened yet, self control is still in order.

It seems that other than Japanese Teachers of English (JTE) teachers dropping by at my desk for a few seconds to inform me about their lesson, most ignore me. When I have Qs I want to ask the JTEs, they always say "I'll tell you later, I'm busy at the moment", come the end of the day, no-one's gotten back to me. When there's a change in schedule, I am never told about it. Cases have happened where I turn up to class and no-ones there; ceremonies take place and I wasn't told until a few minutes before, I didn't go anyway because I didn't have any smart clothes with me; if I hadn't had some inkling about next week's school concert, and so asked about it, I would have turned up to school with no-one there; inspection? not informed about them either. It was so shocking, during the last couple of weeks, to realise that I am not treated as a colleague, let alone part of the team.

It gets me down and sometimes I would rather be in the company of my students rather than the teachers. But you know, it's taken so much time and effort to get here, by the end of my time with JET, I don't want any regrets. I've decided that I'm going to be an annoying persistent bitch and bug people until I get what I want. They may start to hate me, but at least its a better response to being ignored... and guess what, they can't complain about me doing my job, and at the end, at least "I" know that I'd done my best.

So tired. I hate [the lack of] behaviour management. I hate the lack of support for students. I hate the lack of support for native english teachers... I suppose... it's all part of the whole learning experience. Welcome, Miss S. to one of the many possible realities of life.

[Eminem - Love The Way You Lie ft. Rihanna]